One Week

One week from today I will be under the knife.  Hopefully they will be about wrapping up right now if everything goes well.

One week, and yet I really don't feel any additional anxiety.  Sure, I feel little bit nervous.  They're operating on my damn brain!  But it's almost a relief that the day is finally arriving.  I'm enjoying this last week, trying to laugh more, eat some of my favorite foods (apparently I will lose taste for about a month), and just laughing at the world in general.

I will be going to Racine, Wisconsin this weekend to watch my wife do a half Ironman, so this weekend will probably fly by quickly as well.  There are two more things I'd like to do before my surgery.

I'd like to visit my grandmother.  She's not doing too well, and I don't know how long it will before I would be able to visit her again.  I'm overdue to visit her anyway.

I'd like to visit my father's grave.  I failed to do so over Memorial Day.  I'm not a religious person, so one may question what significance visiting a monument has to me.  I still respect the dead, and especially the memories.  I'm also seeking inspiration.  My father, all 5'7 of him, was the toughest bastard I've ever met.  A couple of the surgeries he had were near medieval torture.  He would come out of surgery completely deformed, almost unrecognizable.  Yet, he'd never complain.  NEVER.  He'd always try to be up and about before the nurses would recommend it.  I want to visit my father's grave out of respect, and out of thirst of inspiration.  I plan to be cracking jokes and flirting with the nurses within 24 hours, just like he did.

My spirits are good.  I'm so lucky to have the support system that I do.  The duality of my posts represent my inner conflicts, and the duality of my ownself.  Though sometimes my posts seem negative or on the dark side, one thing never changes in positivity - my friends and family.